INK: Vanishing Point (Book 2) Page 5

  “Cleaned?” My house is usually clean unless the cops have been there. Oh yeah, the cops were there. “I may as well get started on cleaning up after the wrecking crew."

  “There’s more to it than that. I know you don’t want to go to Harry’s, but consider coming to my house.” Eli at least had the decency ask.

  “I could call Trish, maybe stay over there.” Trish never lets me stay at her house. She always comes up with some excuse or another. I know it’s really a no-go but honestly I'm feeling so tired from all that’s happened that I could lay down here and sleep on the leather couch. I weigh the options and lay back on the couch, “Or I could just stay here."

  “Shay, just come back to my house. Jerry isn’t there.” He pleads with those sky blue eyes that melt me to nothing. The problem is, I’m afraid if I go back to Eli’s I’m not going to be able to help myself from asking him a million questions about Taffy and why she was driving his car drunk. I’ve been obsessing over any possible explanation of why they would be out drinking together and why he would let her drive his car.

  But it does seem my options are limited.

  The debate continues about all the reasons I needed to go to Eli’s house until I give in. I guess he’s learned a thing or two from Aiden, the master of wearing me down.

  ***

  Eli behaves like the perfect gentleman when we arrive, “Did you want to lie down for a while or are you ready for dinner?”

  “I could stand to lay down for a bit and hopefully shake this headache.” Along with the incessant need to understand what you’re hiding from me. I start to plot how I'm going to get him to start spilling all the beans. I want to know what’s happening.

  Eli brushes past me with my things from the hospital, “I’ll get you settled in the guest room.”

  The guest room? I should appreciate that he’s not making any wild assumptions about his potential for getting lucky. That surprises me, considering the fact that he hasn’t left my side for weeks except for at the law office. “That would be nice, thanks.”

  “I had the mirror in the bathroom fixed so you should be set.” He puts everything in the corner, “Do you need anything right now? Something to drink maybe?"

  “No, I’m good.” I have to go in for the kill now and get some answers about what happened. I don’t understand why there is still a cop that’s following me and standing outside of Eli’s door. I’d give my left arm for five minutes alone with Carl because he seems to know something. But he’s not going to give up any info with Eli around.

  Laying back against the headboard, I motion for Eli to sit down. “Talk to me.” Maybe if I put it as simply as possible and don’t ask specific questions I'll get a more complete answer.

  “What do you want to talk about?” He sits on the edge of the bed and rests his hand on my thigh. Very bold for Eli. I think I like it and it sort of takes the sting out of Aiden’s absence.

  It would be so much better if I could just get him to volunteer some information, but since the great Aiden mystery is solved I can move on to the next big secret nobody wants to talk about. Not sure if I’m ready for the answer, I tilt my chin down and look at Eli through my lashes, “What happened to me?”

  Sadness and remorse cloud his sapphire lenses; he hasn’t been looking forward to this conversation. “To be honest, no one knows what happened.”

  “Nobody knows what happened to me or who shot me?” This is all very hard to swallow even with the sincerity swimming in Eli’s expression.

  He takes in a breath that goes on for miles, looking around the room as if hoping the words will materialize from thin air. “The best we can surmise is that Aiden shot you. The bullets that were recovered belonged to a gun registered to the Roth family.”

  Eli’s words send a shockwave of pain through my entire being, punctuating Aiden’s absence. I’m used to the hollow feeling I get when he’s gone, but this time he used hollow points to make a break for it. Did he just not want to worry about coming back this time? Or maybe he didn’t want to leave the comfort of his home town so he thought he’d rid himself of the problem and kill me. He blew a hole through more than just my neck. He’s blown a hole through my soul that stitches can’t heal.

  The promise I made to myself about not crying the next time Aiden left has been shattered by the bullets he aimed at my head. My head, he was aiming for my head. The realization runs me down like a dump truck full of gravel; he really was trying to kill me. The tears stinging at the corner of my eyes spill over in a deluge to accompany my uncontrollable sobbing.

  Eli wraps his arms around me encircling me with his comfort, “Shay, we really don’t know what happened and until you can remember everything, we really shouldn’t jump to conclusions.”

  My sadness transitions to anger so fast the tears don’t have time to stop streaming down my cheeks, “Fuck that, Eli; why do you do this every single time? Whenever Aiden leaves all you do is defend him. You say I should be easier on him that he probably has a good reason.” I push Eli away, forcing him onto his feet. His eyes are wide with shock; he doesn’t know what to make of my outburst. I stand trying to meet his eyes to convey my anger directly into him. I want him to feel the pain of this too, the pain of all of his excuses for Aiden. With two hands on his chest I push hard against him, and he staggers back a step, astounded.

  “He-fucking-shot-me and you are making excuses for him.” A sensation of power is brewing inside me, but I don’t feel any control over my words, “Every time, Eli, you hold me, you console me like a whipping boy that can fill the gaps between Aiden’s residency in my life. You’re a fucking pussy. You never fight for me; it's like you’re perfectly happy being a pinch hitter for Aiden. Is that all you are ever going to be, Eli? A pinch hitter for Aiden?”

  I push him hard in the chest again, and his mouth hangs open with disbelief; his watery eyes plead with me to calm down but he doesn’t dare say a word. “You think I don’t feel that hard-on in your pants for me every time you hug me or stand close enough to rub against me? What the fuck is that all about? Your dick waiting for Aiden’s passport to be stamped so you can step in?” I fold my arms across my chest to keep from pushing him again.

  Eli offers me an astonished expression, I’m waiting for the hurt to come but it doesn’t. He stands silent with his only movement being to tilt chin higher with pride.

  So hopped up on anger and adrenaline for my painfully honest verbal regurgitation, my body jolts as I scream, “Answer me.”

  Eli stands a moment longer staring at me. We both hear the front door shut. Eli goes to the bedroom door, closes and locks it his back is to me with his hand still on the knob.

  Secretly I’m hoping it’s Aiden, but I’m sure it’s not, and why did Eli just lock the door? Why isn’t he saying anything? I stiffen my stance, puffing myself out like a scared animal. Eli remains silent.

  After turning and staring at me for what seems an eternity he moves swiftly to me, crashing his lips over my mouth with an intense passion. His tongue rakes across mine, then my cheek and down my neck. Inhaling his scent fills me with passion. The sound and feeling of labored breath sweeping across my skin sends a heat through me that turns my anger into wanting.

  I hear banging on the bedroom door. We disregard it. Eli is taking what he wants and it’s what I want. It’s what I’ve wanted all along. I want him to claim me for his own, not to wait until I’m done pining for Aiden. I want him to fill this void with his methadone and quell the permanent pain that I’ve never known a day without, until tomorrow. Tomorrow I move past the pain.

  The banging on the door persists. Eli takes my face into his warm hands and presses his lips against mine hard and looks into my eyes with an almost threatening intensity, “Don’t move from this spot; don’t fucking move.”

  He turns and swings the door open closing it behind him leaving me in the room. I hear his strong deep voice. “Carl, get the fuck out of my house.” There’s a scuffle and some banging then the sound
of a door slamming.

  Eli returns swiftly, brushing his lips sweetly against my cheek. His fingers tangle in my hair and he presses our mouths together in a long lingering kiss. It’s forceful and sweet at the same time. This is what I’ve always wanted from Eli. To be loved without caution, with none of his kisses careful, only hungry. I need to know that I drive him as crazy with wanting as he does me. This can’t be one-way, like it is with Aiden. I need Eli to desire me more than I want him.

  Eli pulls back from me and I ache from his absence before the air can cool his moisture on my lips. He captures my gaze with his piercing blue eyes and turns his head coyly. His hair brushes over his lids haphazardly. A wicked grin tells me exactly what he’s thinking, and I like it. “Shay, you are mine. I’m not waiting for anyone or making any excuses. I want you and I’m going to take you.”

  He pauses for a moment, his features darken as he gently cups my neck his hands, “Don’t ever call me a pussy again; don’t ever talk to me like that. Do you understand?"

  Heat surges through me like I’ve been set on fire. Eli is drop-dead sexy like this and he makes my insides throb. I’m compelled to say ‘yes sir,’ but the words don’t come. I can only nod as my gaze rounds out in awe at this change in Eli.

  He backs me up to the bed until my knees collapse under me forcing me to sit. He kneels down to match my gaze. A wry and satisfied grin rides on his lips, “Light duty, Shay. That’s all you get tonight. Tomorrow may be a different story." Eli’s raises his left brow in a playful expression, “But don’t you dare think for a minute that I haven’t been fighting for you for years.”

  He lays me back on the bed and all I can do is comply. Eli’s so different and confident. He pulls the covers up around me and tenderly runs his fingers through my hair, pushing it away from my face. “I’m going to come back and check on you, but I want you to get some rest.” He straightens his tall frame, still looking down at me in the bed he smiles like he’s been satisfied with a good meal or even better sex. “If you need anything I’ll be in my office, okay?”

  The spark of heat runs through me as I watch him leave. What the hell was that? Was that Eli Walker staking his claim? If it was I’m definitely interested in seeing what he has hiding in that new attitude of his. I want Eli to be so much more than just a placeholder for Aiden. I want us to have something real, something that isn’t based on Aiden’s current location, and something that can withstand Aiden coming back.

  I’m loath to think of it, but I can’t help but be drawn back to the big question on my mind, which is why Aiden shot me and why everyone seems okay with this. Why did Glass ask me about Aiden’s body? Is it because they don’t know where he is? Surely it’s common knowledge how often Aiden racks up the frequent flyer miles.

  But why did he shoot me? What happened that night that made Aiden either fear for his life or hate me? Did I attack him? Maybe all of this is getting to be too much for him. Maybe he still thinks I killed Gary and Alice, and adding Taffy to Aiden’s list of people I most likely exterminated would also be appropriate.

  The exhaustion sweeps over my eyes making my lids heavy with sleep. I’m not done thinking about this, I’m not done wondering. Aiden needs to come back and tell me why he shot me, or I can’t let it go.

  Slumber takes me over.

  ***

  Eli

  Sucking in a long cleansing breath to cool down after that exchange is a necessity. I need a cold shower. It’s been so long since she and I have been together and sitting vigil at her bedside nonstop has taken its toll. It’s one of the hazards of being near her.

  I thought I would outgrow the perma-hard-on that lived in my pants just for her when she was around. My face should be beet red with embarrassment, but it’s not. She needs to know that I love her in every way, but I’ll be damned if I let her get away with calling me a pussy. What the fuck was that?

  Shay being angry was expected, but she’s never lashed out at me like that. She’s not usually prone to saying random hurtful things as a method of cutting down the innocent. “Innocent;” it rattles through me on a laugh. “I’m not sure that I qualify for that moniker anymore.” Not that I ever did, but after what I did to Taffy I know I don’t qualify.

  The front door opens and Rex comes running in at me. I sit on the floor in the foyer trying to give him enough love and attention to make up for the last three weeks of not being here with him. I’ll have to apologize properly for having left him with Jerry.

  “Hey, what’s up?” Jerry tries to slide by me with a six pack in hand; I really don’t need that shit.

  “You know, girlfriend in the bedroom recovering from gunshot wounds. What are you doing?” I can’t help but oggle the bottle necks sweating with condensation; they look like a fucking commercial and for whatever reason that really makes them so enticing.

  “‘Girlfriend’ huh? Are we back on that again?” He tries to tempt me, holding the bottles closer to me for a moment.

  “I really appreciate you watching Rex for me, but I don’t want those in here, or you for that matter.”

  Jerry puts the bottles down on the counter, “Why? She’s not any good to you tonight. I thought we could hang out.”

  “No, it’s really not a good time, Shay needs to rest and I have a lot of work to do. I’m also trying to lay off the booze.” Jesus Jerry, just take the hint and go.

  “Yeah, well I’m not enough of an asshole to let some skirt tell me I’m an alcoholic. I’m also smart enough to not let one girl lead me around by the dick telling me what to do, so it’s not my problem.” Jerry flips the top off one of the bottles and takes a swig. He is such a dick the way he walks in here like he owns the place, pushes me around and has no regard for the fact this is my house. Jesus, he’s just like Aiden. I don’t know why I’ve never seen it before.

  “Maybe you’re right about that, but you being homeless isn’t my problem either. I want you to leave.” I intended to say it stronger, but it never comes out that way. “And take those with you.” I motion to the now-five pack.

  Jerry puts his arm around my shoulder leading me to the great room. “Eli,” he pauses taking another drink. “We’re brothers; remember ‘Bros before Hos.’” He’s pleased with his third-grade rhyming abilities but I’m just getting pissed.

  “Jesus Jerry, just get the fuck out.” I remove his arm from around my shoulder. Resisting the urge to push his teeth down his throat for referring to Shay like that is proving difficult.

  “Come on, one beer! March Madness, man. I was hoping to catch it on the big screen.” Jerry motions to the TV mounted on the wall.

  “No, get the fuck out Jerry. Now isn’t the time. I really appreciate you taking care of Rex for me. Tell Mom I’ll be over to see her when things die down.” I open the front door waiting for Jerry to exit but he just stands there. I wish he would just leave, just once fucking listen.

  I don’t want to have to throw him out bodily. Mom gets so upset when we fight even when he needs an ass-whooping. I’ve got to get him and his beer out of my house. I don’t want him here when Shay wakes up; she can’t stand him either. After realizing how like Aiden he is, I’m not sure if it’s that or how Jerry hits on her like I'm not in the room.

  No. Thinking about Jerry hitting on Shay really grates on my last nerve. Rage is building in me that’s starting to feel like it can easily get out of control if I let it go unchecked. I grab Jerry’s beer off the counter and slap it hard into his chest, “You’re leaving right now.”

  “Seriously man, it’s the Syracuse/Miami game, Miami is gonna kill,” Jerry whines, taking hold of the bottles.

  “Jerry, go.” I’ve resorted to simple one word commands in hopes that if I keep it simple he’ll comply.

  “Fuck that bitch, Eli. You can have any woman you want and you put up with bullshit from a whore with a gash that has someone else’s name on it?” Jerry looks at me as if he speaks the absolute truth. “She’s just another girl, Eli, another girl who only wants yo
u when someone else isn’t around. I guess Aiden never showed back up or her mouth would be full of his cock right now instead full of…oh wait, no one’s because she’s not even putting out for you right now. Fucking waste." He shakes his head in disgust.

  My hands are starting to shake. I hate the way he talks about women and people in general. He’s wrong about her.

  Heat fills my face and my fists are balled up at my sides because I’d like to wrap my hands around his neck and squeeze until his body goes limp. Stepping in close enough that he backs into the wall, his eyes widen as he loses the flippant expression. He cowers slightly up against the wall and I say a brief “thanks” to Mom for giving me height along with some decorum. Heh, decorum; ironic I’m touting that virtue when I'm about to pummel my brother for being the asshole he was born to be. “Get the fuck out, Jerry.”

  “Mr. Walker, may I?” Carl appears in the doorway looking at Jerry like he hates him more than I do.

  “No, I’ve got this,” I tell Carl, who I appreciate being there at this moment. Jerry usually will take his chances with me, because he knows I'll go easy on him. He may not be as sure about Carl and he’s fucking huge. I’m still a little surprised at the way I talked to him earlier when I told him to go outside, but that was my dick doing all the talking, not my good senses. I take Jerry by the shirt sleeve and tug him toward the open door.

  “Come on, Eli. Seriously?” he pleads as I send him out. He stumbles tripping over the small step in the entry.

  “Yes Jerry, seriously.” Even though I want to slam the door I close it lightly. I don’t want to wake Shay if she’s managed to fall asleep.

  Carl stands motionless, looking at the door, then to me, “Sorry, Mr. Walker.” He hesitates as he reaches for the door knob.

  “It’s fine Carl, just stay.” Maybe he’ll help me keep my mind off the two ticking time bombs I have in this house: the unopened bottle of Johnny Walker Black in my bottom desk drawer and Shay in the bedroom. Either one of those could be my downfall tonight. It’s too much to ask for but I really want Shay to wreck me in the bedroom like she always does, leaving me unable to move, but at what cost?